Midwifery Care Kicks Ass

I'm not one to brag, but when it comes to the prenatal care I've received, you probably can't get me to shut up.

Constance Miles is our midwife and she is awesome. Her care has been tremendous; hour and a half long appointments are not abnormal. Oftentimes they are filled with talk not only about my and my baby's health but also about dreams, emotions, how my husband is fairing, etc.



We sit and sip tea and have been sent home with extra garden delights, including flowers for my husband's birthday. Prenatal care shouldn't be any less, but hearing others' experiences, including how tests and measurements are done without an explanation of their reason (let alone their outcome) are unfortunately common. Thirty minute appointments, if that, seem to be more the norm. How can you possibly care for a woman, her child and partner in that amount of time? I can't answer. What I can say, is when it comes to you and your baby's health, seek nothing but the best, whatever that may be for you.


Since I have no baby photos to show you (the stubborn thing still hasn't made it's way into the world yet...despite being in my 42nd week), I'll share what I can of the little-bean-unseen. These photos were taken about two weeks ago.


Now, where is that little creature...I'm starting to think there might be an alien inside me who prefers a parasitic life.




Even my sexy husband can't distract me enough from my hiding babe!

Seven and a Half Years of Loud Silence

So, yesterday I finally did it. I 'talked' with my mom. It was a one-way conversation, with me writing and posting a card, expressing myself as clearly as possible.

The need to contact her has been brewing for quite some time, and has peaked during my pregnancy with a whole new set of questions entering my realm.

I had been vacillating this past month about just picking up the phone and calling her, yet I never willed myself to do it, for fear of having anything negative come up at a such a sensitive point in my life right now.

With my due date coming and going, going, going, I started to wonder if I was holding on to anything. I welcome this baby with open arms, so why is she/he not arriving?

Yesterday I decided to pull an angel card and let them speak. 'Family' was the card. This card had many meanings, one was a new addition to the family, and another was 'It's time to face old feelings so they can be released and cleared' and 'the first person that comes to mind is the person'....As some of you know, I've worked on forgiving my mom this past year quite steadily. It hasn't been an easy journey. Often I would have one memory that would come up and my anger would arrive like wild fire.

My quest with BodyTalk has helped me to learn that forgiveness is really forgiving yourself more than any one. Carolyn Myss' book, Anatomy of the Spirit, was another very useful guide and companion in my quest. I finally integrated what forgiveness really is, enough to understand that I do forgive my mother, fully and completely.

So, emotions poured yesterday and the procrastinated deed has been done. I feel very clear and still.

Hopefully this will inspire someone else out there to face a difficult situation they are having in their lives with honesty, openness, and love. Nothing is impossible, no matter how dark, ugly and awful it may seem.

Light enters, at some point, always.

Blossoming and Growth

With Baby G's birthing day quickly approaching, the element of wood is very much on mind. In Chinese medicine, the element of wood is one of 5 elements and represents, among other things, birth and growth.

Baby G has been blessed with a talented papa who did an amazing job of painting a beautiful tree in his/her room.

Greg sketched a tree with pencil and then taped it out, followed by painting the trunk and branches. We then worked together and painted white blossoms all over.

I love spring and cherry blossoms are without a doubt the essence of spring at it's most abundant. I believe no one has captured the beauty of cherry blossom trees better than Akira Kurosawa in his film, Dreams. A must see if you haven't already indulged in it's luscious cinematography.

I completed the piece by filling in the blossoms with silver filaments and orange stamens. The green butterfly was a little addition that I think gave the piece a nice balance.

Now, Baby G will be surrounded with beauty and love whenever he/she is in the room.

Please, Say Hello to My Belly

As much as I have enjoyed being pregnant, I will never be someone who says, 'I wouldn't even know I was pregnant if I didn't have this big belly.' Nor would I want to. One reason is the many, very real, and sometimes surprising, physical changes that have been taking place in my body over the last 35 weeks. Just a month ago my husband witnessed me trying to stand up from the couch to go pee then breaking out in hysteric laughter, filled with streaming tears, since I couldn't move my legs without a very loud pain shooting down my leg. He then assisted my seemingly never-ending, 25 foot maneuver to the bathroom. (Thankfully, the sciatic pain I've had is fleeting.)

Mostly, though, I would never want to say that because I've wanted to be very conscious of the life - my baby - growing inside me. I was thinking the other day how I've heard women comment on how bold strangers have been with touching their tummy. I've never had a stranger attempt to touch my tummy. Several acquaintances and close friends yes, but strangers, no. (I've certainly been bombarded by the commentary and questions from strangers about my size, and anything they would like to add about pregnancy, my body, or babies in general.)

I am in my 9th month, and my tummy has been ripe for touching for a while now. So, what gives, I wonder? When it comes down to it, I wish that more people would touch my tummy. I am actually surprised at how few people acknowledge the baby when they greet me. Even people who are knowledgeable of how much babies are aware of in the womb have refrained. Could it be they are too shy?

One of my baby's best friends is my BodyTalk Practitioner, Kate. Kate has always greeted the baby with glee and intimately every time I see her for a session. The baby has responded in kind (by either a smile, or large or small movement to acknowledge her back). He/she loves our visits to Kate. The fact that I'm aware of this speaks to how connected you can be to your baby prenatally, and they to you.

Credible research shows that, the fact is, babies are conscious beings well before they leave their little water world. They know - energetically, emotionally and physically - what is going beyond their life in in the uterus.

So, the next time you see a friend who is pregnant, remember to greet her baby as well. You will likely hear the baby say hello back. That is, if you're listening.

A Poem for Baby G

So, yesterday I had my first shower for little Baby G. My friend Rachel helped put it on for my husband, Greg, and I. We decided to make it a combination blessing/shower. Even though I was a bit tentative about having a large group for an intimate blessing, it turned out very well.

First, we ate some spectacular food, cooked by Rachel, and drank mimosas, then we had the blessing. It consisted of people reading poems, sayings, and thoughts that they had either written or were inspired by. I had people transfer them to muslin so that I could sew up prayer flags. (With so many, I'm thinking of a different project I could do with them to give to the baby when he/she is older. Ideas?)

In any case, it was a group of just under 20 and everyone appeared comfortable with the blessing, including little 22 month old Melly who was nursing and humming along, doing her own blessing of sorts.

Since I haven't been inspired to write a poem in a long time and it came so organically, I wanted to share what I wrote for little Baby G.

***

Gifts for Your Birth Day

You are a product of a joyful and loving nature.

Your father and I conceived you with our love
and everyday we fall deeper in love with each other.

This is our first gift to you, Baby, our presence to each other.

The divine has sent us caregivers who will honor and rever your passage.

A spiritual and talented midwife and assistant

who will allow you to choose when and how you want to be born.

This is our second gift to you, Baby, Constance and O'Nell's presence to the birth of our family.

On the day of your tender passage - from water to air - womb to world -

I choose to be fully aware and lucid to every stirring,

every movement and need that you will have during your transition.

This is our third gift to you, Baby, your mother's full and complete bodymind presence.

On that glorious day - your birth day - we will be there

to honor and greet the divine in you.

We will welcome and cherish you.

This is your gift to us, Baby, your beautiful, wonderous, and magical presence.
Our precious baby, we are so in love with you.

***

Update: I ended up sewing together these prayer flags and hanging it up in Little B's room....the room where she was born. I'm sure these prayers helped me to have the birthing experience I desired.